Camels, Shmamels...

The New York Times informs us that the Old Testament isn't reliable as a historic record.

 No! Say it ain't so!

Anyway, it is unlikely that there were domesticated camels in, say, Abraham's time.

This,

Dr. [Noam Mizrahi, an Israeli biblical scholar] likened the practice to a historical account of medieval events that veers off to a description of “how people in the Middle Ages used semitrailers in order to transport goods from one European kingdom to another.”

really tickled me.
Put me in mind of Drunk History's reenactment of the Aaron Burr-Alexander Hamilton duel.

The inebriate chronicler waxed mournful while describing Hamilton's tragic realization of his impending doom, and told us how the Founding Father had "called his wife, he called his family" to say good by.

True Confessions

I can never remember the rules for apostrophes and possessive pronouns.

"Ones"?
"Its"?

Who's Your Grandaddy?

I think I have read this other places as well:

Pope Francis has meanwhile likened Benedict's presence to "having grandad in the house."

Really?
It seems odd that the Holy Father would so opine.
In what world does ones grandfather have only 11 years on one?

"No musicians, just singers...."

This is an interesting thread (no nastiness for a change, or smug sectarianism,) but in a comment the thrust of which I agree with, came this line

every parish should have under its belt a setting of the ordinary that it can sing without need of assistance from musicians.

No.
No, no, no.
Please say,  "sing without need of assistance from instrumentalists." Or "without need of musical leadership," if that's what is meant.
Those who sing, be they choirs, pew-sitters, priests, cantors. whatever  - those who sing are musicians.
They are making music.
Priests, even tone-deaf ones must understand that they are obliged to produce music, they must be taught to understand that their singing THEIR parts, (dialogues, EP, etc.) recto tono if need be, is the sine qua non of a well-celebrated Mass With Music.

Terrifying Idea

As a liturgical musician and a catechist for children, my blood ran cold when I came across this idea for a "Catholic Elementary Religion Activity":

Following a lesson on the Mass, ask your students to plan the music for one of the parish's Sunday services. Arrange for the parish's liturgy coordinator to visit your class and give students tips on how to choose music appropriate for the season and type of celebration. Pass out hymnals and instruct students to choose hymns for the processional, presentation of gifts, communion, communion meditation and recessional. If you are teaching older elementary students who are sufficiently knowledgeable of the liturgy, have them select which versions of the Gloria, Alleluia, Lamb of God and Amen to use in the Mass. Invite parents to attend the service their children have prepared.

Missing Her...

It has not been a good week, or rather, it has been a good week, a great week for remembering R, and not just for the anniversaries that fall at this time of year, (retrospectives that mention the Holy Fathe- um.... the Pope Emeritus, have me welling up, too.)
(I almost bought three books of his on Abebooks the other night that I already have.)

The pleasure I take in something R. and I would have enjoyed together is like a dagger in the heart.

(Though, as I said, it is pleasure. I want to remember, I like remembering, even if it wracks me with sobs.)

How she would have thrilled to Piotr Bezcala's voice!
I don't think she ever had the opportunity to hear him. (And he a Pole!)
And an embarrassment of riches,  not just Rusalka in the theater, but Onegin on tv. I'd forgotten how glorious that full-throated opera sound can be, too much going for baroque in the past few years. :oP

And R was as much of a tenor groupie as I.
(Speaking of Rusalka, shouldn't she be played/directed as more of... well, say a zombie? instead of a Little Mermaid [in the Disney version] gushily romantic heroine? it made the Prince seem like not just a cad, but an idiot to complain of her lack of passion and strangeness. I digress.)

"The Met Live in HD" experience came far too close to the end of life, she should have been able to immerse herself in years of it.
I imagined last week she would have sat up and taken notice when that picture of Jonas Kaufmann advertising the new Werther appeared on the big screen, (she admired his Siegmund on television, although her contempt at the teeter-tottering Valkyries in the staging almost put an end to our viewing that afternoon.)

Isn't this a phrase? from a NYTimes article, Kaufmann's vocal effort:

comes across as rivetingly muscled rather than irritatingly strained.

"Rivetingly muscled."

Mmmmm....
Isn't that kinda what you want sometimes? Especially from a tenor.
Jonas Kaufmann should have played Valjean in the movie.

Instead of raising a glass to her memory, I think I'll go watch some Youtube of Bezcala in R.'s honor.

I thought I was the only one....

... who couldn't remember the difference between "c and "ce."

But I believe "one" should use "his" when referring to his or her own possession, not "their," and I cannot risk the wrath of the Grammar Nazi today.

News polls show a majority of American Roman Catholics believe Ice Cream Should Have No Calories... oh, and that...

...women should be allowed to become priests.

I'm not sure why a ceremony conducted in a United Church of Christ, by an Episcopalian minister is covered by a purported news organization as if it had anything to do with the Catholic Church, but they're kinda funny in Sarasota.

Do they bother to report on other individuals who leave one faith for another?

Or who otherwise ignore the tenets of their putative faith?
"It is widely reported that Jenna Q pewsitter slept in on Sunday."
"Local Baptist Man Fudges on Tax Return"

I'm tired of the "openness to divorced Catholics, openness to gay, lesbian, transgender, bisexual people," meme.

The Church is open to all of them.
Also to drug addicts, cranky old ladies, felons, TV meteorlogists, serial twerkers,...

Oh, did I misunderstand?

Ahh...
You aren't interested in Her being "open," you don't care about being welcomed -- you want endorsement.

You want Mom's approval, not of yourself, but of your transgressions, whatever they may be.

You want Dad to say, not "Bring my finest robes, kill the fatted calf!" but, "No, son, you were right, what a fool I've been, I wish I had had the smarts to squander my money on dissolute living and gone through my property with loose women.
"Hey, I got an idea, grab your older brother and the three of us will hit the whorehouse."

Chate...Katachee.. Cateces....Oh, heck, education about God

Ah, yes, catechesis. God bless spellcheck.
When I was young we variously referred to it as Ratty-chasm, "chatty"-chism, catty-keester...

Did a lot of web-crawling today to find out if there isn't a better way. Adopt home-schooler's programs? Make one up as we go along?

When I joined this group of volunteers, I learned that the head of the program felt the textbooks, (fully compliant,) just existed as a CYA with the diocese, and that we teachers were really free to do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted.

Which is how you get teachers who make statements like, "the Bible readings are the real heart of the Mass."
(Oversight has improved.)

I have learned that my team teaching partner thinks I am teaching way over their heads.
Maybe.
But I remember throughout (almost,) my entire tenure as a faith formation student feeling bored, and worse insulted - and I was one of the few actually interested in the subject.
So I try to mix it up - if you teach only to the least prepared, most disinterested member of a class, those who might actually be able to get more out of the class end up wanting to shoot themselves.

But that's another matter, I'm sure I haven't found the right tone to reach everyone.

No, my real concern is...
Well, an example:
Yesterday, we were going to talk about Mary's role in salvation history and Valentines Day. (I will not say which of the two topics was my choice, and which the other fellow's....)

Teaching the Rosary was how the text chose to structure my portion of the day's festivities, (it was silent on the other.)

Fair enough.

But I learned it was pretty much impossible to talk about the events we refer to as the mysteries when half of the kids don't know the "stories."

I don't mean Mary visiting Elizabeth, or the proclamation of the Kingdom, or Mary receiving her crown... I mean, to take an actual example, an incident more basic to our Faith - Jesus dying on the cross.
"Huh?"
Of course,  95% of them did not know the story of the Prodigal Son, (and I don't mean pretended not to know because they were bored, or disengaged - they were interested as I told it during our class about confession. They literally did not know it.)
Or that Moses had been given the Commandments by God.
(Or - and I'm sure you will fell I am making this up, Reader - how many of those pesky commandments there were.)

This is not a class of converts.
There are no ESL matters to be dealt with.
These are all children who made their First Communion three years ago, and some of them don't remember if they have received Communion since, much less if they have ever heard anyone read Gospel, (or Old Testament,) stories.
They don't seem to know anything.
I think this is connected with the (in my mind, troublesome,) three year lectionary cycle, but that's another matter, too.
(And since many of them virtually NEVER attend Mass, I must admit, the same Gospel being proclaimed every week would not make it any more familiar to them....)

I think it is to their great detriment that we neglect the extraordinary ability of children's minds to grab hold of and preserve knowledge, even without immediate.

Tell'em stuff!
Tell it to'em again!
And then repeat it!
They don't understand it?
That's no reason not to learn it.

They don't understand the Immaculate Conception? the Blessed Trinity? how grace "works"?
Guess what?
NEITHER DO I! Neither do the other teachers, or the pastor.
Neither does the Pope.
The great Truths of the Faith are also great mysteries, and we do grow in understanding of them, but understanding them fully is beyond human ken.

But for the love of God, (literally!) use the gifts children have, use the areas in which they far exceed us geezers, utilize their capacity to absorb information.

This doesn't all make much sense, does it...

I'm tired....

"Mercy killing is such an ugly phrase...."

And so is "assisted suicide," apparently.
It's all about rebranding, huh?

Advocates of the practice, who shun the term “assisted suicide,” say they believe that as the generation that wants what it wants when it wants it and feels entitled to never be inconvenienced baby boomers watch frail parents make spoken or unspoken demands on their money emotions and time suffer, support for their movement will grow further.

See? it's not just Sheldon....

...they're all idiots.

Feast of the Presentation, "One of the Principal Feasts of the Church?"

Not everyone is on board with that sentiment.
I once told a visiting priest, in a confession after Mass, that I was glad SOMEBODY had bothered to look at the Ordo.
(Which was an unnecessary snark, but I've done penance for it since.)
(In fact, some of the penance actually involves the Sacrament of Reconciliation, which I am often uncertain as to my reception thereof, because I'm not actually given absolution in any form I recognize. Is it valid if the priest just "thinks" the words?)
Yesterday?
Green vestments, penitential rite, sermon about everything other than the feast at hand, a number of jokes and asides...

On the other hand, the little boy in Sunday school assigned the role of Simeon projected, actually dropped to his knees as he proclaimed the nunc dimittis, and prayed and acted the stuffing out of it.

So all in all, a good day.

Now, Lord, You let Your servant take down her Christmas tree in peace....

Ubi caritas et amor....

In the williteverend whinging over the nolongernew English translation of the Roman Missal, the commentariat at one blog continues to let us know they are Christians by their love, by their love, yes we'll know...

I’d love to know what kind of payoff the various members of VC received from the publishers for their betrayal of the Catholic faithful. What’s the difference between the members of VC and other purveyors of the world’s oldest profession? Beats me…

I feel sorry for the several congregations reported on there who are somehow unable to pronounce "and with your spirit," "hosts," etc., and so have been "silenced."
Lest that be thought facetious on my part, I reiterate, I am genuinely sorry for those parishioners, because their muteness speaks volumes about the quality of the leadership they enjoy in their parishes.
I suppose it is possible that those reporting on these troubling times in their parishes are not leaders, per se, bearing none of the blame, but pew-sitters, who while virtually vocal enough in comboxes, do indeed suffer from some disorder of the throat or vocal cords and are actually silent now, as they would perforce have been with the old translation.

Or they may suffer from selective mutism, and require inebriation, either of the spirit, or the more traditional kind.
Of course, the cure may be worse than the disease.

 Baring the Blame for Their Silence?

A Voice from the Pews...

A most interesting blog on the sad state of parochial music in Roman parishes by the always worth your time Kathy Pluth suggests that it is an odd occurrence for random parishioners in the pew to start up whatever hymn they choose during Mass.

I hope that that is so, that it is indeed rare, although I have lived in two different parishes, (in the US,) where this was liable to happen.

Although in one of them, I guess it was not so very random, it would only ever be O Lord I Am Not Worthy, God Bless America or Let There be Cheese in Church.

I was emboldened to start, on my own... motu proprio? humming the Gregorian Ave Verum once during communion after OLIANW's three verses were finished....
Felt bad about it afterwards.

What jackass...

... decided to market August: Osage County as "hilarious"?
I mean, I know senses of humour differ and all that, but chicken in a biscuit...
I'm very glad that Himself received pre- "awards season" screenings copies of a number of films this year that I would have been spitting mad, had I paid for them.

And it's not that the film is without its merits, but talk about false advertising...

"Sources close to hell report that...."

That, from Damian Thompson, in a witty send up report of a, frankly, castrated new Rite of Baptism.


I do miss having browsing time...

Overheard Confessions

Between the uncontrolledly booming voice of the confessor, and the fact that he was a bit tubby and couldn't close the door comfortably, I was pretty aware, from hearing his end of things, of all the concerns every penitent brought to him.

The trouble was, I had the actual answer to a problem of the man who preceded me.

Should I have given it him?

Thankful? Grateful? To WHOM exactly?

I heard on television somewhere that that this is the holiday when we express how thankful we are to our family and friends...

The Questions That Plague Me...

No kids came to the house, and as I finish up my leftover Halloween candy -- LIAR! you went and bought more after, THAT'S what you're finishing up--- okay, okay, but the question that has me bemused and confounded is:

If these are "snack" sized, where in blazes can I get my hands on the ENTREE size heath Bars?

Sorrow

Collecting and dispersing the belongings of a loved one is difficult.

Who would have thought it was more difficult to go to morning Mass and catch sight of a familiar sweater, on the shoulders of an old lady who apparently shops at the St Vincent De Paul?

Mind you, I also was wearing belongings of Hers, shoes and perfume.

Not ONLY, of course.

All Souls Mass was particularly hard, made easier by passing the time during added-on "rituals" calculating how many days indulgence having to listen to a strikingly disneyfied version of Eagle's Wings was worth...