So tired....

Obviously I'm approaching all this wrong, or I wouldn't feel like this, and so many plausibly psychosomatic problem would not be plaguing me.... BUT
But, BUT, BUT--
The Berlioz chorus sounds not just not bad, but GOOD. And "Bring a Torch" sounds joyful and confused and perfect. And the psalm (Thank you, thank you, Jeff Ostrowski!,) sounds quite beautiful (I have set some verses polyphonically and in, [my (perhaps mis-)understanding ]of faux-bourdon.) And the Bach chorales sound purposeful and positive. ANd the various Ordinaries, inevitable.

And, best of all, In splendoribus finally sounds like a prayer. And besides that, (I was going to say "beyond that," but it is quite clearly a lesser achievement,) gorgeous. GORGEOUS.

Sometimes, it is just about finding the precisely correct words to convey to the choir what, in your heart, your soul, your brain, you KNOW it should sound like.

But Lawdie, I feel lousy....