Clapping Glorias and Other Nasties

Nearly woke Himself snorting with laughter at a few lines in both in Damian Thompson's Holy Smoke and the comments thread to this particular blog.
The topic straightforward enough: Will the Pope say old Mass in St Peter’s?
but then:
it will infuriate the trendy Tablet magazine, whose Rome correspondent Robert Mickens is in a terrible flap at the prospect.
Mickens is famous as the Catholic commentator who dissolved into tears of disappointment when Joseph Ratzinger’s name came booming over the loudspeakers after the conclave. These days he wanders around Rome with the pursed lips of a maiden aunt, pinching his nostrils to keep out the clouds of traditionalist incense that come billowing out of the Vatican.
“People who are interested in such things continue to speculate that Pope Benedict will soon celebrate the Tridentine Mass in St Peter’s Basilica,” he announces in his Tablet notebook this week. What a deliciously snooty turn of phrase. I hate to remind you, Robert, but the “people” in question include the Pope. Here, borrow my hanky.
And actually, Damien, the people in question seem to include the one doing the sniffing, Mr. Mickens.
Oh, he doesn't like it, but he obviously cares deeply.
And one of his readers has this to say:
I suspect 'liturgist' refers to someone who faffs about with rubrics.
HAR!
Another:
Presumably 'real' liturgists have certificates confirming as much as several days attendance at a workshop
(I omit the politically incorrect remainder of that line....)