But anyway, this:
.... TOTALLY happened to him once, he took a tumble whilst swooping a long cape in which he had become entangled on a staircase while performing onstage.
Really. Same as Ms Ciccone. (Actually, he fell much further, with greater consequence. You see, there had been no goat to break his fall.Thankfully, he was younger, and healed quickly.)
You'd think he'd want to know, but trust me, he doesn't.